Sometimes a single line is enough to throw an entire editorial team off balance.
In this case: “Runaway turtle – call (413) 0512-20XX with any information.”
What sounded harmless immediately triggered frantic typing, excited interjections, and at least one knocked-over coffee cup.
Was this the clue we had been waiting for?
A secret vacation spot?
An undercover mission in the tropics?
A hidden tunnel under the city that is only accessible at high tide?
Of course, we checked the phone number first—because so far, these numbers had always turned out to be hidden clues to golf tournaments.
But this time, nothing. No golf tournament anywhere.
That put us on a new trail: If it wasn't golf, then what was it?
The turtle, the water... Maybe this time we had to look for events that had something to do with water.
Our research eventually led us to a strange incident: the disappearance of a boat in Portsmouth Harbor.
Not stolen. Not sunk.
Just gone.
The owner's wife, Mrs. Evelyn Carmichael, expressed her concern to the editorial team.
Her husband, Stanley Carmichael, mayor of Pittsfield, MA, was not the type to leave his boat unattended.
Nevertheless, she was confident:
“Stanley will be back by the tournament next weekend at the latest.”
Golf tournament?
That rang a bell.
(Editor's note: Pittsfield is not exactly known for its seafaring and, as far as we know, does not have its own harbor. Whether the mayor voluntarily weighed anchor or whether other forces were at play could not be conclusively clarified by the time of going to press.
(PPS – Editor's note:
While this issue was being laid out, someone in the editorial office noticed that there had been a second missing person report on the same day:
In Salisbury (MA), of all places, the librarian had disappeared.
Officially, the incident was classified as an “unremarkable personal absence” – a phrase that also applies to lost umbrellas and misplaced books, but the wording caused some internal head-scratching.
A lost turtle.
A missing boat.
A missing librarian.
Just a coincidence?
Or is there more to these cases than meets the eye?
And if so...
how wet is it going to get?
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